I even was able to launch a capsule clean out of the solar system (which, um, yea I totally meant to do that or something), breaking the sun’s hold on it and pretty much leading to a whole lot of nothing. Once that progress was made, I was doing all kinds of neat stuff in no time. I’ll get to it just as soon as I land on the Sun. They should let you rename all the stuff. The Kerbals even survived the trip! See, I’m a Kermanitarian.ĭespite this looking like Earth, Kerbal’s solar system is not actually an accurate model of our solar system. The amazing sense of accomplishment, so sincere and authentic that I got a little teary eyed. It took me several hours to pull it off, but once I did, it was one of the happiest moments of my gaming life. I wanted to see if I could break the barrier of space on my own. So, after ten hours of doing things like “accidentally” forgetting to deploy the chutes once my contraptions had failed to break orbit (kidding, I didn’t actually include parachutes, but I didn’t want the Kerbals to know that), I decided to actually, you know, make an effort and shit. So I strapped some rockets to the cockpit, fired up some Steppenwolf, and in the name of science, I pretty much committed Kerbal genocide.īut, that does grow old quickly. Did Louis Armstrong have a tutorial when he landed on Mars? Hell no. Launch controls and figuring out how the little globe thing you use to track your position in the sky are more complex to learn, though again, there’s a tutorial. The building interface is pretty good, but could use less sarcastic descriptions of what specific parts do. A race of Muppet-looking frog things so cute and innocent that they’re practically asking to be blown up by sadists using the most exotic firecrackers in gaming. Just me, an extensive warehouse of parts, and the titular Kerbals. Unlike Brian, who decided he would play the tutorials and missions so that he could know what he was doing, I decided to just spend the next forty hours or so messing around in the Kerbal’s sandbox mode. The Kerbal I condemned to death in this hung the toilet paper roll under-handedly. My first ship, which blew up as soon as I ignited the thrusters.
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